Thinking Back

Remember when you were growing up and your mom said something like " I hope you have two just like you"?  Well, I never really thought about it until I did have two just like me.  My son has many qualities that I remember in myself before I became the person I am today.  He is sensative, caring and not very outgoing.  I look at him sometimes and see the thing I did not like about me, but I love him very dearly and would not want him any other way.  I know he will also break out of his shell and be a wonderful man and make some sweet girl a loving husband.  He loves deeply and never wants to hurt anyone's feelings. 

My daughter on the other hand is just like I once was when I thought I was invincible and no one could tell me I was wrong.  She is a very confident person, can be very sweet but also won't listen to a thing I tell her, she wants to know the who, what when, where and why.  We are currently going through some stuff that I have had to appologize to my own mother for.  Although I love my daughter dearly, this week has been really tough on me.  I only hope that she will not let someone break that confidence, or allow someone to abuse her.    She does not let anyone get close enough to know her deep feelings, which is just like me. All I can do is pray that I am making the proper decisions as a parent and that they will make the right decisions when I can't be with them. 

I have heard it said the toughest and best job you will ever have is being a parent.  Up until this point, I thought it was pretty simple, just trust your instincts, but now, I think that statement is pretty right on. 

In case my mom reads this: 

Mom I am very sorry for the heartache I put you through.  I probably would not change it.  I am glad for the relationship we have now because of it. I LOVE YOU.

Ripples in the lake of life

When I was a kids we used to go to the lake alot in the summer and I would always try to "skip" rocks. Problem was that I did not have very good technique and usually the rocks just went in with a plop and make little ripples.  Then it became a game to see how big of a rock I could throw in to make the ripples go the farthest.  Well, I think life is like that, only I am the rock that has been thrown.

Have you ever thought about the ripples you have made in your life?  To get an idea, look at your facebook page and see how many friends you have.  Most of these people you have touched in some way.  Maybe it was someone you were not very nice to and you need to make amends, maybe it was someone you were very close to but lost touch, maybe it was someone you barely knew but they really looked up to you.  When someone requests to be my friend on Facebook, I will send them a message to ask how they remember me and if it is only because I am friends with ten of their friends I usually will not add them.  If it is someone I am requesting to be their "friend" I will also send them a message with the request and tell them how I remember them, and then it is their choice to add me or not. 

Somehow I have made ripples in over 100 people's lives and I am not even sure what the ripple was.  Some of the people in my "friend list" have made a ripple in my life.  I want my "ripple" in life to be a positive one.  What about you?